With the advent of advanced technology giving birth to social media platforms, the act of socialising assumed significance by leveraging the technology. Over a period of time, the use of social media is turning out to be a menace for innumerable families as its rampant misuse has been impacting relationships, especially the marriages. Today, social media and marital disputes go hand-in-hand for those who do not place boundaries on their social media usage.
TIMES LINK EDITORIAL DESK reproduces experts’ tips to at least reduce the negative effects of social media on marriage:
Avoid social media after a disagreement or fight
Various studies have found that the habit of boardingthe social media platforms after a disagreement is very common in relationships and marriages of today.
People can develop the habit of going to Twitter, Facebook, and other social media sites and expressing whatever they have in mind. One of the effects of social media is that it is very easy to turn to social media for comfort and distraction when there is tension or a storm in your relationship.
At that tense moment, you could post nasty and unpleasant remarks that you will surely regret later.
You might even get depressed by all the posts and pictures of adorable couples out there. You might even be lured to look for a better relationship rather than trying to work things out with your spouse.
Be each other’s best fan/follower
One of the advantages of social media is that it is easy to send a note to each other at any time; make sure you put yourselves out there and make public shout-outs to each other on social media.
Show the world how proud you are to have each other and use this as a positive effect of social media on marriage.
Avoid critical comparison
There will always be a couple who seems to have a better or worse relationship than you. Avoid all comparisons to save yourself from the negative effects of social media on marriage.
Instead of evaluating and comparing yourselves to them, concentrate on making your marriage the best it can be. And when you read what other couples have shared, don’t see it as a competition for scoring points – enjoy the content for what it is worth.
Dr. Jennifer Schulz, PhD, in Psychology, says,
“It’s also important to remember that people tend to post only the high points of their lives on social media, so you may not see the problems or day-to-day struggles other couples are experiencing. If you compare yourself to others on social media, you might end up feeling like you’re behind, when in reality, you’re only seeing the positive points of their lives, and none of the struggles that make them human.”
Don’t always be online
Don’t let social media steal every moment of your relationship. If one (or both) of you is always scrolling through their timeline or news feed, even at dinner time or while in bed, the other partner will feel ignored, like they don’t matter.
Therefore, learn to have some offline time to avoid some of the effects of social media on marriage.
Set boundaries regarding social media
To protect yourself from the adverse effects of social media on marriage, it is advisable to set boundaries regarding the use and time spent on social media with your partner.
Your partner might feel comfortable with you talking about them and your love for them openly, or they might want to enjoy privacy and prefer to keep your relationship off social media.
Dr. Schulz says,
“It’s also important to set boundaries around when social media is used, and for how long. For instance, you might decide that social media is off limits on date nights or during family dinners.”
Be transparent; don’t keep secrets
You should be open and not keep secrets from your partner. You have to be transparent on social media. Don’t post, like, or share anything you would not like your partner to read or view. It’s also a good idea to think twice about who you send a direct message (DM) to on social media.
If you want to decrease the negative impact of social media on relationships, then you need to be open and transparent with your spouse.
Don’t look up your ex
No matter how beautiful or handsome your Ex is, don’t try to look or lust after him/her timeline; it destroys marriages! Most people have the attitude of stalking their ex to see how their lives are; it is bad and should be avoided.
Never talk badly about each other in public
No matter what problem you face with your spouse, don’t ever air them on social media, or you will invite the negative effects of social media on marriage.
Taking your relationship issues to social media might make your spouse feel humiliated. Sort whatever it is that’s bugging you both among yourselves, not putting them on Twitter.
Be cautious of what and who you like
Liking and commenting on pictures of handsome men or beautiful women has ruined many relationships and marriages. You should be careful of what you like, especially if it will make your partner jealous or insecure.
Limit what you share on social media
Be careful not to share things you or your spouse do not want others to know. Social media can be tempting, but it is always best to check before posting something that includes someone else, especially your spouse.
(Source: marriage.com)
